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Alistair Shaw

Face Your Fear

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Why is fear such a reality in everyone’s life?  It’s a negative force that not 1 person is immune to, but have all suffered from.  Like a popular disease that has no vaccination, it goes around infecting all with its destructive symptoms.

Now, there is a very obvious difference between being afraid when an armed robber attacks you and living with a fear that leads to self-doubt and intimidation.  Having the common sense to run from harm is always encouraged, but running from people and situations just because they make you feel uncomfortable and because you don’t believe in yourself, there’s no excuse for that.

During my primary school years, I was a very shy introvert who barely spoke to anyone.  I had many self-doubts and insecurities and didn’t actually know or realize that there was a whole other way of life beyond my own reality.  Yes, I had my friends whom I spoke easily to, I wasn’t completely withdrawn, but I was very quiet and private.

By age 13, a friend who was 6 years older than me introduced me to a whole new way of life!  She (by her own lifestyle) showed me that it was okay to be unique, okay to be myself and to be free.  It wasn’t long before I broke out of my self-made prison and began a journey that would change my life forever.

I began facing my fears and challenging myself to remove restrictions that I allowed others to place on me, and one by one started cutting the ropes which held me captive.

Freedom from fear is a process and will only be effective if you constantly apply yourself to the cause, without ceasing.  Remember, if you fail and give into fear, get up, shake off the dust and try again. Your persistence will yield amazing results.

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Doubt Will Kill You

I noticed at a very young age that I had an incredible attraction to music and singing.  Visiting my grandparents, I would always open their piano and start playing.  Even though I had no clue what I was doing, I loved it; and they allowed it – which was awesome!

When it came to singing, I knew I had a voice, but was incredibly shy, and did not enjoy singing in front of people.  The only time I ever sang was in the choir or at Eisteddfods.  I did manage to squeeze out a few notes in Sunday School so the other kids could sing along, but I hated it!

Only at around the age of 15 did I slowly begin breaking free from that fear and gradually became more and more confident to sing in public.

That’s just one example of how fear held me captive for so many years.  You see, we all have fears and insecurities and we all are limited by them.  If you’re not careful, doubt will kill you and all your dreams will suffer because of it.

No matter what your doubts are, remember, you are amazing, you have been blessed with talents and abilities that only you can excel at!

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World’s First Invisibility Cloak

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Scientists at UC Berkeley have developed a foldable, incredibly thin invisibility cloak that can wrap around microscopic objects of any shape and make them undetectable in the visible spectrum. In its current form, the technology could be useful in optical computing or in shrouding secret microelectronic components from prying eyes, but according to the researchers involved, it could also be scaled up in size with relative ease.

Objects are visible to us because a small portion of the light that hits them is scattered in the direction of our retinas. Invisibility cloaks can make objects disappear from sight by exploiting the unusual optical properties of so-called metamaterials. These special man-made compounds can manipulate light in unique ways to guide it around the surface of the cloak, so that no light is reflected from it or the object it’s shielding.

An ultra-thin invisibility cloak developed at UC Berkeley can wrap around objects of any shape and conceal them from sight

Cloaks have already been devised that work in the visible, infrared and ultraviolet portions of the electromagnetic spectrum. However, while successful in bending light around an object, these devices also disturb the phase of the electromagnetic wave; so, while the object remains hidden as no light is reflected off it, the cloak itself can still be spotted through specialized instruments. What’s more, these devices also tend to be very bulky and hard to scale up in size.

A team led by UC Berkeley’s Xiang Zhang has now leveraged significant advances in metamaterial engineering to design an improved cloak that is especially thin (only 80 nanometers thick), does not suffer from the phase detection problems of previous cloaks, works in the visible light spectrum, and could reportedly be scaled up to shield macroscopic objects.

Yuan Wang, Zi Jing Wong and Xiang Zhang have devised an ultra-thin invisibility “skin” cloak that can conform to the shape of an object and conceal it from detection with visible light

The cloak works by using arrays of gold nanoantennas, with each one manipulating the phase of the light wave that is scattered off the cloak. When a cloaked object is illuminated by 730-nanometer wavelength (deep red) light, the antennas make the cloak act like a perfectly flat mirror, regardless of its current shape.

Zhang and team tested their invention by wrapping the cloak around a cell-sized object with a highly irregular shape. As expected, when red light struck the cloak, it reflected off its surface as if off a flat mirror, making the object beneath it invisible even by phase-sensitive detection. When the polarization of the nanoantennas was changed, the cloaking effect stopped entirely.

“This is the first time a 3D object of arbitrary shape has been cloaked from visible light,” says Zhang. “Our ultra-thin cloak now looks like a coat. It is easy to design and implement, and is potentially scalable for hiding macroscopic objects.”

While the ability to pull a Harry Potter with a large-scale version of this cloak may be years away, the current version could already find use in hiding sensitive layouts of electronic components or aiding the development of optical computers.

A paper detailing the study appears in the journal Science. You can see the cloak in action in the short video below.

Shake It Off

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There’s nothing quite like the dawning of a brand new day!  A fresh sunrise, accompanied by the gradual opening of beautiful flowers who welcome the morning dew as a tasteful touch to their exquisite glory.

Too often we start a new day with the baggage of yesterday, weighing us down and burdening us from deep within.  Instead of ending each day with a conclusion, we prefer to adopt a ‘to be continued’ approach and ruin the following episode of life.

Wouldn’t it be better to shake off the dust of yesterday and start anew, start afresh and approach this new day with vigour and purpose?

The solution is simple – let’s conclude each day and bring it to a close by acknowledging the mistakes and successes and ‘shake off the dust’ of that day; and when you wake up, after having a good night’s rest, choose to shine with radiant glory like the beautiful flowers as they welcome the new day!

Whatever you do, just shake it off!

Lamentations 3:22-23 (NLT) puts it so beautifully:  The faithful love of the Lord never ends!  His mercies never cease.  Great is his faithfulness; His mercies begin afresh each morning.

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You Can Make A Difference

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The world is a jungle with lots of crime, poverty, injustice and many other community ails that make life very unpleasant.  When faced with social issues like these, we the average people who are not in places of power and influence often feel quite powerless and as a result we shy away from such things.  When it comes to community awareness and social justice there are always a very select few who get involved.

I think one of the biggest hindrances to the process of someone who is willing to try and make a difference would be where to start.  It starts with you! You can make a difference! If you believe in the fact that God has given you certain abilities and you have a heart to see change and transformation take place, then you are half way there!

Instead of reinventing the wheel, why not join an already existing community initiative and bring your strength to the table.  We all have a role to play in community wellness, it all starts with a smile and a willing heart.

So, what do you have in your hand? What are your strengths, gifts and abilities?  Once you’ve figured how you can best contribute, you are on your way to making a massive difference in the lives of the people around you.

If you need help figuring our what your strengths are and how you can further develop them, please click on the banner below and contact us today!

Stay Positive If You Get Retrenched

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Stay Positive If You Get Retrenched

If you were retrenched twice at the peak of your career in your 40s and then again in your 50s, would you:

(a) Lament that life sucks and feel angry for a long time and become a disillusioned person OR

(b) Help your fellow colleagues find new jobs as you take on a new role in a new industry yet accepting a 40% pay cut

Guess which option Mr Bryan Yeo, “a survivor of retrenchment”, took?

His career was smooth sailing until one day, there was a sudden change in the company’s direction to withdraw investments from Singapore. This resulted in Bryan being made redundant. The news of being retrenched was an extremely bitter fruit to swallow, as he had three teenage children and family commitments.

Instead of lamenting that life was unfair, Bryan took each retrenchment in his stride and moved on with strength and support from his family.

Even though he had already been told of his retrenchment, being a manager, his priority was to ensure his colleagues get placed in a new job often through his contacts. He understood that the given his seniority in his job, it would be more difficult to land a job of the same level. Fortunately for Bryan, he received a call on his last day of service that offered him a job with 40% pay cut. He was grateful for the opportunity and took the offer without asking the job scope. Bryan has since recovered the pay cut that he took and is better off than before.

Bryan shared how his positive attitude made a difference in the outcomes of his choices that enabled him to stay resilient and go from strength to strength in times of crisis.

1. Lifelong learning is the key to more opportunities

  • No one can guarantee a job. Hence, it is important to constantly upgrade to prepare and create more job opportunities for yourself.
  • Bring up skill set to improve overall work performance.
  • Learn new skills and widen your job scope to remain relevant.

2. Know that it is not your fault. Retrenchment is a business decision due to globalisation and economy restructuring

  • Expect the unexpected. Be prepared for transition even during times of growth to manage career changes.
  • Early career planning to create several portfolio of careers to get ready for changes.

3. Accept changes in order to adapt to new environments

  • Embrace change with a positive mindset and right attitude to grow.
  • Consider new sectors resulted from the new economy.
  • Believe that change is possible regardless of age.
  • Positive attitude make a difference in the outcome of choices.

4. No one owes you a living

  • Invest in yourself and take ownership in personal development to learn new skills.
  • Create and maintain useful networks when you don’t need them as it’s often too late when you need them.
  • Be financially stable to remain sustainable in a crisis.

If you’ve been retrenched you have the power to adopt a positive attitude and not to let it affect you negatively.

Credit:  Edited // Caliberlink

The Power Of Choice

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There is much we don’t have control over in life.  We can’t control the weather, we can’t live someone else’s life for them, we can’t wave a magic wand and cause a pink flower to become green.

When it comes to circumstances and experiences in life, there are plenty of things we don’t always have control over.  The passing of a loved one, for example – it could be sudden and without any prior warning.  The loss of a job due to restructure or retrenchment, you may or may not see it coming; bottom line, if it’s out of your control, it’s out of your control.

There might be many things I don’t have control of, but what I do have power over is my attitude – the manner in which I respond or react to hardships, difficulties and people in general.

You have the power of choice, the power to decide what to do with the information given to you or how to respond or react to the person who did you harm.

Your attitude, your outlook and your approach to life has a huge impact on the type of person you will be.  Consider an athlete who stumbles while running a 400m race.  The winner gets up, composes himself and gets back on the track and approaches the scene knowing that he is a winner and has the ability to recover lost time.  The loser sluggishly gets up, very uncertain of his ability and gets back on the track with a defeated mind-set – in his heart he has already lost.

So, when difficulties and uncertainties hit you, how do you react?  What attitude will you adopt? Are you defeated in your approach, or will you rise and conqueror with humble courage?

If you need help with the power of choice and making the right decisions, please contact us today.

The Secret Enemy in Your Marriage

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We had been married just over a year. After another demanding week at work, neither of us wanted to get into it. And with changes going on in our families, we were both emotionally and mentally distracted. There was a high probability we would say things we didn’t mean and make matters worse.

What was it about? I don’t even remember, to tell you the truth. But I do remember that we exchanged complaints, barely restraining the passion over the injustice we each believed we had suffered from each other.

Both angry, both hurt, we walked into separate rooms and stewed on the facts of what felt like a derailed relationship. Our tendency in the conflict was to isolate because it was easier than trying to resolve it.

We thought we wouldn’t have the marriage troubles others had. How naive of us to assume we had all the answers when we had barely even begun to understand the questions.

What is the secret enemy in your marriage?

In that and many other times we walked away from conflict instead of talking through it, my wife and I fell prey to the secret enemy that hides in every marriage.

Left untouched, unexpressed conflict will turn assumptions into accusations and accusations into evidence.

No, it’s not you or your spouse: it’s unexpressed conflict.

You can disagree on what color to paint the kitchen, the best school for your kids, and even about which church denomination or political party is best. Those disagreements may cause friction and some heated debates from time to time, but they won’t destroy your relationship if you don’t let them.

Those unresolved conflicts can last as long as you’re both alive. You can agree to disagree and move on. But unexpressed conflict is a poison that slowly, secretly infiltrates every part of your relationship.

Left untouched, unexpressed conflict will turn assumptions into accusations and accusations into evidence. It’s like rendering a verdict when the other person didn’t even know court was in session.

Unexpressed conflict gets really practical, really personal, really fast.

Tension built up day after day from unvoiced irritations will sour the good experiences your family wants to have. Failures to apologize and bury the hatchet will kill the mood; say goodbye to laughter and sex when one or both of you feel wronged or uncared for.

When you allow your guilt about a mistake to grow into shame, you won’t even want to try to be a better spouse. Shame keeps spouses apart by telling the lie that you are bad, not just what you did was bad.

That shame perpetuates itself because it operates like a prison. You don’t know the way out, and your spouse doesn’t help you find a way out, so you start to believe you really do deserve punishment because you’re a bad person.

After You Recognize the Conflict

It’s one thing to see conflict and know it’s there. Usually, it looks like stomping into another room, or seemingly eternal car rides home after blowing up at each other in front of friends. Almost everyone can see those social cues of conflict.

What matters is how spouses express it to each other. The very act of expressing a misunderstanding, feeling or frustration with your spouse can actually create a stronger sense of togetherness that will help resolve the issue.

As Brené Brown writes, “Giving and soliciting feedback is about learning and growth, and understanding who we are and how we respond to the people around us is the foundation in this process.”

Once you recognize that there is unexpressed tension in your relationship, here are five practical ways to deal with it:

1. Go First

It takes bravery, maturity and a healthy dose of humility to speak up about the conflict before your spouse does. Yes, those among us who are non-confrontational will struggle with this, but it’s essential to confront in goodwill, for the good of the relationship. The sooner you address the conflict, the sooner you can cut off its power to harm the relationship (Proverbs 17:14).

2. Admit Your Mistakes

This is risky, but it’s one of the most powerful ways to disarm conflict in your marriage. No matter how embarrassing, admitting your mistakes is the beginning of relieving that tension.

3. Speak Honestly

Unless both spouses kill assumptions and express what they’re really feeling or thinking, the conflict will continue to be a pain point in the relationship.

 4. Attack the Issue, Not Each Other

Honest confessions and authentic apologies aren’t weapons to keep in your back pocket for a time when you’ll need to whip him back into shape, or keep her quiet about one of your weaknesses. An attack against one of you is a threat to both of you. Marriage isn’t about winning, but moving forward together.

5. Cultivate Trust

Don’t say you’ll change some habit and then make no effort to fix it. If you promise to do better next time, keep your word (and lean on God to help you change and grow).

Without the oxygen of trust, the relationship will suffocate. Both of you can step toward each other in the security of your relationship if it’s built over time, through good times and bad. That trust is the scaffolding on which your relationship depends, especially in times of conflict.

Working together, you can identify and defeat the secret enemy in your marriage.

Credit: Relevant Magazine

Keep Hope Alive

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There are many things that get us down, cramp our style, and kill our vibe!   People disappoint us all the time by lying to us, cheating us, stealing from us or even slandering our names and attacking our character. The list goes on and on.  Most times though, we recover fairly easily from these events.  Yes, sometimes we need counselling because such events can be quite traumatic, especially when it involves someone we trusted and loved very dearly.

What keeps us going, what causes us to rise above these hardships?  Some claim it’s their inner strength, their own abilities to endure and conquer.  I however believe its simply a four letter word called HOPE!

If you have hope of a brighter today and a brighter tomorrow, you surely will endure and conquer trials that come your way; you’ll get up from the ground when you’re beaten down, you’ll shake the dust off and you’ll rise above the darkness that put you there, and you’ll shine even brighter, all because you have hope!  Keep hope alive at all costs!

I have been through some pretty rough times and my one constant has always been Jesus, He has always carried me through the difficult and dark days, and He too will carry you if you allow Him to.

If you need hope, let Jesus take all your worries because He does care about you!

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Black Movies Are Dominating the Box Office

Black Movies Are Dominating the Box Office

Recently, The Perfect Guy, a sexually-charged (yet still PG-13) thriller topped the three-day box office with a very solid $26.7 million, besting the more discussed M. Night Shyamalan “comeback” project, The Visit. Take a cursory look around the Hollywood trades and you’ll see commentary about how The Perfect Guy, a film which stars three black leads, Sanaa Lathan, Michael Ealy, and Morris Chestnut, exceeded expectations on its way to the weekend victory. You’ll also see rightful acknowledgement of the fact that The Perfect Guy’s triumph makes five weekends in a row that the top-grossing film primarily starred black actors, with the Alex and Stephen Kendrick’s spiritual-leaning War Room taking the top spot the weekend before, and Straight Outta Compton dominating screens for three weekends in a row in August. 

 

 

On one hand, despite some of the surprise from box office gurus, the five-week run of box office success for films featuring black leads is impressive. On the other hand, that said gurus are so surprised, and that this streak is so impressive despite the fact that it occupies less than what will ultimately be less than 10 percent of the calendar year, does not speak highly of the film industry’s ability to create legitimate opportunities for black talent. 

As Selma director Ava DuVernay alluded to perfectly on Twitter on Monday, Hollywood shouldn’t be shocked that black people like to go the movies. Roughly 60 percent of the audience for The Perfect Guy was black (and more than 70 percent was female). Though this is a somewhat high concentration of just one group, it likewise demonstrates a concept that is seemingly more scandalous in Hollywood’s eyes: that ‘mainstream’ moviegoers—i.e. white people—will see movies featuring people of color too.  

DuVernay’s biting Twitter commentary knowingly addressed the potential ramifications of this five-week run, or rather, the lack thereof. You see, we’ve been here before. If it hasn’t happened already, there’s bound to be a think piece about how these box office victories aligns with TV’s supposed turn toward diversity. Most of last season’s big new hits on TV displayed significant minority representation, led by the cultural supernova Empire but also including How To Get Away With Murder, black-ish, Jane The Virgin, and Fresh Off The Boat. A wave of stories about appealing to people of color and TV’s improved diversity predictably followed. 

The problem is, as Flavorwire’s Pilot Viruet wrote in March after interviewing some of today’s black writers, and as scholars like Herman Gray and Kristal Brent Zook have also established, that Hollywood has historically considered “diversity” to be another, only occasionally followed play in the marketing playbook—and not a legitimate attempt to better represent the world in which we live. In case you were skeptical of that claim, just read this much-derided late March Deadlinestory with anonymous casting directors and executives wondering, already, if the “pendulum [has] swung a bit too far in the opposite direction.”

There’s historical precedent for this as well. In the ’80s and early ’90s, black audiences flocked to the theater to see films starring Eddie Murphy and directed by Spike Lee, and found more representative TV offerings on the still-nascent Fox network like In Living Color, Martin, and Living Single, among others. While Murphy and Lee’s careers continued far past this period, the film industry’s interest in displaying the black experience in high-profile projects did not. Similarly, once Fox reached white viewers with The Simpsons, Married with Children, and The X-Files, it no longer had use for black audiences. 

Where we are in the annual film calendar also cannot be underestimated here. August and early September make up one of Hollywood’s yearly dead zones, right after the lucrative gamut of blockbusters and right before the prestigious awards season truly kicks off in late September and October. That Straight Outta Compton, War Zone, and The Perfect Guy were slotted in this period is not a knock on the films themselves but, unfortunately, a telling sign of what Hollywood believes it can accomplish with films starring black performers. 

In fact, it’s absolutely no surprise that Screen Gems placed The Perfect Guy on the second weekend of September because a very similar film, the Idris Elba and Taraji P. Henson vehicle No Good Deed, did almost identical box office returns on the same weekend last year. If you look further into the past, you’ll see that 2009’s I Can Do Bad On My Own, 2011’s The Help, and 2013’s The Butler all had similar late summer runs leading the box office. And you’ll also find that Kevin Hart, the most newly minted bankable black star, has done most of his “surprise” damage with films in other dead periods—most notably with Think Like a Man in April 2012 and Ride Along in January 2014.

Of course, there are films starring black performers that have done extremely well at the box office in plum spots, most notably the Fast & Furious franchise, the most progressive and inclusive franchise in all of Hollywood, and most anything starring Denzel Washington. Nevertheless, the increasingly common occurrence of an off-season hit starring black performers suggests that Hollywood has established a formula for how and when to appeal to black audiences. That’s not progress, it’s a cunning, craven use of market research.

With all this in mind, we shouldn’t devalue this five-week streak; it’s wonderful. Yet, there aren’t real lessons to be learned here. You know that people of color like to see themselves on-screen, and that white people can enjoy films like Straight Outta Compton or The Perfect Guy. Hollywood knows this too. But the truth is that while we might be living in a “new era” of improved diversity, better opportunities for minority artists, and more appealing options to minority audiences, history makes it hard to believe that the trend will become the norm. 

Credit: Relevant Magazine

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