This week I was sad to hear two stories within days of each other of the heart-breaking effects of bullying or emotional abuse on a child. Even into adulthood, these individual’s lived with deep-seated rejection, a sense of isolation, loneliness, lack of confidence, brokenness, bitterness and unforgiveness. These and many other destructive emotions threatened to undermine the mental and emotional well-being of the one on the receiving end of the bullying.
I also heard though of how other individuals brought healing and wholeness to these same people later on in life.
Hurt or heal? We all have a choice.
In every interaction, every day, we get to choose to speak words that break a person down or build them up. With every word and action, we sow the seeds of hope or hopelessness that will later reap life or death.
We can speak words of affirmation with kindness or cruel, crushing words that suck the life out of a person, leaving them a sad shell of their former self and with little hope of reaching their full potential.
The Bible says,
“The tongue can bring death or life” – Proverbs 18:21.
What will you speak into someone’s life today?
Perhaps you carry the emotional scars inflicted by a bully?
Rather than drag the offences of the bully around with you, choose to forgive. Let go of the bitterness that threatens to keep you stuck in those unpleasant places.
Release those negative emotions and begin to speak words of affirmation, truth and life over yourself.
To the bully
It’s never too late to stop speaking death.
It’s never too late to start speaking life.
Start today.
Pause before you speak. Before you act.
Contemplate the consequences of your words and actions and choose life.
Choose to speak and act out of kindness, with the other person’s best interests at heart.
One moment at a time. The choice is yours. Choose life.
When the bully becomes a friend.
Two girls used to bully me in high school.
In the new school year, they were split up into different classes and I had one of the girls in my class. I was nervous and feared what she would say and do, but we got chatting one day and I asked why her and her friend had bullied me the year before. She shrugged her shoulders and said she didn’t know why and that she was sorry.
That was it – no other explanation. We left it at that and we went on to become friends.
A bully is someone who was bullied – it’s may be the only way they know how to interact with those around them.
Show them a different way. Starting today.