R.E.S.P.E.C.T
In my previous post I began looking at four qualities that are found in people of character: Integrity, Respect, Honesty, and Compassion. Last time the focus was on the value of integrity. This post is all about respect.
Unlike integrity, respect is a characteristic that comes up quite a bit in popular culture. There are songs written about, it’s something that most people desire from those around them, and you often hear of individuals described as being respected in their area of expertise. Despite this, trying to explain the concept of respect to a child can still be tricky.
The dictionary defines respect as being:
A feeling of admiring someone or something that is good, valuable, important, etc. A feeling or understanding that someone or something is important, serious, etc., and should be treated in an appropriate way. A particular way of thinking about or looking at something.
Respect is all about how we treat other people. It’s about placing value on others and acting accordingly.
I went to a parents evening at my daughter’s school recently and the principal spoke to the parents about respect. He outlined three different types of respect which make explaining and teaching respect a whole lot easier for parents hoping to raise well-rounded, respectful, amazing kids.
1. Respect that is given
As individuals we each have our own decision to make about how we view other people. I personally believe that everyone, regardless of race, religion, background or social standing, is valuable and created equal by God. This personal belief means that everyone deserves to be treated with respect, and I show or give them respect because of this and nothing else. This is not a respect that can be earned, it is given freely without reservation.
2. Respect for a position
The Bible gives a great example of respect for a position in the Ten Commandments. In Genesis 20:12 we are told to honour our father and mother. No reason is given for this – it’s not based on whether they are good parents or not. The reason to give respect in this instance is purely because of the position of authority that they hold. Teachers, parents, country leaders, police officers, your boss, all of these are positions of authority and demand a level of respect. It is appropriate to respect people who hold positions of responsibility, not because of who they are as individuals but because of the role they fulfil.
3. Respect that is earned
This is the one expression of respect that is based on qualities or abilities that people have. You may respect someone for their generosity, their honesty, their courage, or the wisdom they live by. You can also respect someone because of their skill; footballers, actors, musicians and the like. When someone has earned your respect it normally denotes a certain level of trust and emotional investment.
Respect for fellow men is one thing, but the Bible takes the idea of respect a step further. In the book of Psalms we read that an awed respect of God is the beginning of wisdom. Through it we are able to learn, and to gain insight about life and the world that otherwise would be closed to us.
Live and learn
We live in a diverse world made up of different people groups; cultures that conflict with each other; a variety of races. Without respect it’s impossible for these differing factions to live in anything even remotely resembling harmony and peace. If as individuals we are unable to respect those who think differently or espouse different values than we do, we withdraw, become insular and develop notions of superiority. You cannot learn if you don’t have respect for the ideas or teaching of others – and a person who is unable to learn is a sad individual to say the least.