A good father

Growing up looked a little different for me. I didn’t come from a broken home; I didn’t have divorced parents; but something felt like it was out of place. All my life I rebelled against the fact that my dad had a say in my life. We didn’t really have the best relationship – he was always working, and if he wasn’t working he would be taking his frustrations out on me. It was like a never-ending cycle. It was pretty confusing and uncomfortable to me, because the more he pushed, the more I pushed back. Let’s just say our home was pretty intense most of the time.

I started to look at my dad and his life because I knew what was wrong with me, but I wanted to try and figure out why he reacted the way he did. I found some pretty crazy stuff: turns out he was an orphan from four years of age and never knew what it was to have a good father figure in his life.

It’s crazy that generations of bad fathers could have an effect on my dad and me. It was surreal to me but I continued to try and figure it out. It boiled down to my dad reacting and acting off of his hurt and his experience of what a father was.

I finally figured out a method that helped me to deal with the situation: I realised that in order for there to be a good father, there needed to be a good son. If I wanted my father to treat me with respect, I had to show him that I would be consistent in all I did. I had to make him proud even when he wasn’t looking.

And so it brings me to today: The relationship between my father and I are better than ever. It’s weird thinking about it because I’m not used to it yet, but looking back, I know change only came when I decided to step out in faith and become a son that he could be proud of – not to make him happy, but so that generations to come will carry the same heart for family that we do now.

Godspeed.

Do you have questions about Jesus or would like to know more? We would love to connect with you. Just click below to send us your questions!