There really is something addictive about social media. Every time that ‘likes’ number goes up it’s as if all the validation our little human selves are looking for is satisfied. The number of hearts grow and your sense of worth grows.

But it shouldn’t.

You are you and good enough without the whole world having to approve your photo on the beach.

The problem with the likes situation is when the likes don’t come.

You don’t need social media likes, you need inner likes

It’s easier than you think to become addicted to the pesky affirmation of social media, and it’s harder than you think to break the habit. Usually, if you are able to find your self-esteem and value outside of social media than the habit of living for likes is easier to break.

Self-esteem is how you think and feel about yourself

If you have low self-esteem you feel inferior and worthless. With high self-esteem, you have the opposite qualities: confidence and value. Your self-esteem should be high. You shouldn’t need propping up all the time or affirmation from people or things.

The good news is there is a lot you can do for your self-esteem yourself.

Never expect perfection

It’s good to go for the best but you will constantly feel like you are never good enough if you set the bar on perfection. Nobody is perfect. No situations are perfect. No life will ever look perfect. It’s not set up that way. It’s better to go for good and be happy with that. Do you have a good job? Be happy. Do you have great friends? Be happy. Do you live in a good place? Be happy with that.

Give back

The best way to forget about all your issues is to gain some perspective by helping those who have less than you. Helping others makes your problems seem smaller and adds to your self-esteem.

Why not find a place to volunteer, even if it’s only once a month?

Live with excellence

If you don’t wash your hair. If you don’t clean your clothes or eat properly then the chances of you struggling to keep a high self-esteem is uh, high. Diet and exercise make you feel good. You don’t need to be a health nut but some small changes in this area will have big ripple effects in other areas of your life.

What are your triggers?

Difficult events can trigger a low self-esteem. “I always mess up”, you may find yourself saying to yourself. Try not to let negative events taint your self belief. Try to see the other side, the potential and the possibility – oh well, that door closed. Maybe a better one will open.

What are you good at?

We all have a sneaky ability to look at what other people are good at, what we are bad at and create our self-image out of that. It doesn’t work to your advantage. There are things you are good at. Sharpen those things. Get good at them and be proud of yourself when you do them well.

Set goals

When you do something difficult and overcome it then you are able to feel a sense of accomplishment. This feeling will ultimately help aid the growth of your self-esteem.   

Focus less or likes and shares and instead go out there and have fun. Focus on what really matters, purpose and people.