Flip – that’s a heavy title. Don’t worry I’m not going to be all morosely poetic about life. This is a practical post about fighting for your dreams – but it’s important to mark out things that might just kill your dreams. Life is hard and it requires a degree of stubbornness to stand up and charge through when you get knocked down. So – here are 5 ‘dead zones‘ I have learned to avoid in my journey.
It’s a blog cliché these days to talk about comparison. But it is seriously one of the most slippery slops to fall down. In a day and age where we are made aware of people’s successes and good fortune by the minute on Facebook and Instagram, Forbes and reality shows, it is hard to stay in-touch with reality. The reality is – if it needs to be edited (whether by a filter or a whole team of professionals), it is not real life. The honest truth is that success only comes through hard work, tough situations and maturity. Do you want to do well in life just to show other people on Instagram? Or is there a greater influence and sense of purpose that you are made for?
This was a big pitfall for me especially while at university. There was always another awesome series, a more exciting conversation, a prettier girl, than the logistical process I had to engage with to move my dream forward. You can be distracted by pretty much anything – discouragement, tiredness, entertainment, the wrong influencers and advisors, your own emotions… All of these things are ultimately your responsibility, however. If you become ruthless at doing what is needed rather than just what feels nice, you’ll steer clear of this deathtrap.
Now this may be an interesting one to navigate. The harsh truth is that we don’t always get everything we want straight away. If you have a dream, you better hope that it is going to take time to process – otherwise you aren’t dreaming big enough. But as you work towards what you feel you’re called to, the responsibility of paying your own bills and ‘adulting’ will rear its head. Family can also pressurize you into doing things that feel completely opposite to what you are dreaming of – and you will have to navigate the tension of honouring those you love while still being unapologetically passionate about what you know you need to do. For me it looked like working 3 part-time jobs for two years instead of waiting around at the place I would have rather been full-time. It meant paying students loans and honouring my parents while doing everything I could outside of those responsibilities to still do what I loved. Don’t give up on your dreams simply because you have more responsibility. ‘Adulting’ might seem like a delay to your ultimate purpose, but life is about the people you do it with and the state of your soul. God promotes and if you trust Him and stick to it, at the right time things will start gaining momentum.
The all-or-nothing mindset
You wouldn’t believe how many times I have heard young people say, “if I’m going to commit, I want to be all-in”. It is an honorable intention, but a terrible excuse as well. If you are waiting for the perfect moment when you can do only what you have dreamt of and nothing else, I’m sorry to say you will never reach your dreams. There needs to be a degree of ‘hustle’ – burning the midnight oil, juggling the expectations of others while still being able to give time to your own. Nothing enduring will ever be established without sacrifice. And if you aren’t willing to sacrifice for your dreams, then it’s worth asking whether you believe in yourself at all.
This is the kicker. I know that everyone wants to do everything they can to achieve what they want, rather than do what they need to. I remember battling crippling frustration – doing tasks that others love but I couldn’t stand, while there were things I knew I had the skillset for that weren’t being done somewhere else. Impatience will lead you to trying to make things happen prematurely. As I wrote before: God promotes. If you want your life to be fully beneficial, there is no way that God cannot be involved. He has the best for you and if you trust Him to do what you cannot, you will find yourself further than you ever thought possible in a short amount of time. The only way you can battle impatience and not fall prey to your demise is by trusting God once you have done everything you can. If you would like to find out more on how you can do that, click on the link below.