Trust Issues

There’s this word that carries so much value in our world.  Integrity.  And it’s an enormously big deal, this integrity thing.  It’s so big that it’s something that every single person holds dear, and it’s even in the Bible.  Your parents expect your level of it to remain at it’s highest, and so does your boss, and your spouse, and the guy next to you in the bus.  We are often really suspicious of people and hold their trust in the highest of regards.

Let me explain this practically:  You’re a married guy who works as a doctor.  You and your wife head off on your separate ways to work.  She is dropping your kids at school and you head straight to the office.  You trust your wife to drop the kids off safely and you both trust the teachers and other school employees to actually teach your children as well as protect and discipline them.  You park your car and trust the complete stranger that parks next to you to not bump or scratch your extremely valuable asset.  Your work friend brings you a cup of coffee.  You trust he’s made it to be just the way you like it with just the correct bitter sweet ratio. Your first patient arrives.  You trust them to arrive on time so that your whole days schedule doesn’t fall behind.  They trust that you’ll make the correct diagnosis and they trust you’ll prescribe the correct medication that will actually make them feel better and see them on the road to recovery.  You trust that they will pay you, and you don’t have to chase after them for the money, come the end of the month.  You go out to a restaurant at lunchtime and you trust they have used good clean ingredients to make your meal and that they washed their hands.  I’m sure you get the picture. Our entire day’s experiences hinge on the integrity of the people with whom we share every detail. It’s an entire house of cards and 1 single breaking of that trust and, BAM, it all comes tumbling down,  Bad service, an unfaithful spouse, a customer who tries to steal from you, or food poisoning.  1 Link in the chain goes down and you have trust issues.  ‘We’re never eating here again!’  ‘I’ll never date again!’  ‘I’m never parking my car here again!’

I hate to say this but I’m convinced we’ve all had so many bad experiences across the board, that we have serious trust issues, and are not even willing to give many people the benefit of the doubt concerning their integrity.  Now we expect things to go wrong or people to make mistakes.  We can be cynical and untrusting and mostly we keep our guards up.  Sounds pretty sad.  Who do we trust and who can we count on?  Strange how we sometimes trust so easily and 1 mistake makes us see everyone in the same, negative way?  That’s simply how big a deal trust is.  1 Man breaks your heart, all men are pigs!  1 Woman cheats on you and no women can be trusted!

It’s time to work through our hurt and show grace.  Let the pain or frustration or whatever emotion you’re feeling run it’s course but don’t let it destroy you.  Take the time you need but try again.  We all need a second chance somewhere along the line, so why not offer it to someone else. It takes a long time to rebuild trust but if you never allow the process to start, how can it ever be completed?

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