Confrontation – how to handle it

I can’t imagine how anyone could love confrontation. A few years ago, when I was in a management position that required me to confront people about unacceptable or below-par behaviour, I said that if I ever got to the place where I enjoyed confrontation, I’d know it was time to resign.

Although that wasn’t the reason I did leave my position and the company I worked for, I still hold to the same sentiment, but I do think we can get better at confrontation.

Have the courage to confront

Things To Remember About Conflict:
  • What you have to say is important. If something’s weighing heavy on your heart, it’s time to speak up. You’ve spotted something that needs fixing, be confident in confronting the issue.
  • The person needs this challenge, in order to help them grow. They’ve got a blind spot in a particular area and could use your perspective to help sharpen them.
  • They are not fragile – give them more credit. Take care of your words and have the courage to “speak the truth in love” – The BIble talks about this in Ephesians 4:15.

A recent UK survey found that two-thirds of workers become unbearably stressed at the thought of having to confront someone about something. Eleven percent of people get nightmares and struggle to sleep in the lead up to a difficult conversation.

I guess it boils down to fear – fear of man.

Michael Hyatt (successful author, blogger, speaker and former chairman and CEO of Thomas Nelson Publishers) calls himself a ‘conflictaphobic’. Here are some of the main reasons he avoids conflict:

  • He worries about feeling embarrassed
  • He doesn’t want to lose face
  • He doesn’t want to be wrong
  • He doesn’t want others to think less of you

Sound familiar?

Over the years, Michael Hyatt, along with countless others have learnt that courage is not the absence of fear. Rather, it is the willingness to act in spite of fear.

Are you a ‘conflictaphobic’? Don’t allow your fear of conflict to keep you from having the courage to do what’s right. I challenge you to ‘act in spite of your fear’. Step out and ‘speak the truth in love’ today.